In an effort to keep up with Ed’s relentless roll call of spiky dread’s crap-punk cousins, I’ve ventured into the dusty depths of my record collection and unearthed an album which I probably should never have paid for.

Don’t get me me wrong, there are some fantastic, all be it silly songs on Splodgenessabounds’ eponymous debut but as a rule, I prefer to steer well clear of comedy records (with the noted exception of novelty rap music which for some god awful reason I can’t get enough of).

It’s also a nice addition simply because there isn’t much in the way of reggae represented in the oi regions of punk’s many sub-genres, no doubt partially due to the breakneck speed at which most oi sets are conducted, and of course the sorry fact that oi garnered an unpleasant right wing following, highlighted by some of it’s hardest working practitioners being vile racist shitbags.

Suffice to say this was not a scene where England’s multicultural values were generally celebrated, and therefore not a place to find punky appropriations of Jamaican music.

Fortunately Splodge and co represented the cuddly, jovial face of oi, eclipsing their Neo-Nazi associates by scoring a top ten hit in 1980 with the punk-pathetique anthem Two Pints Of lager And A Packet Of Crisps Please. Though not the obvious song to get the rerub treatment, Two Pints (Dub) is a well executed slice of rugged reggae, unfortunately bookended by extended soundbites of the original version.

Had this been a stand alone track, I’d have given it pride of place alongside the best of spiky dread but simply for preempting the worst show ever commissioned by the BBC, I’m lumping this one in with the crap pack.

And if that’s a little too good for the crap fans, try this cod-botherer out for size…

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